Kill The Rumour
Kill The Rumour
He has a pet bat called Jonathan whom he teaches knitting and Japanese. He cannot knit nor speak Japanese. Tom Rosier – Guitar, backing vocals Tom was flown in from Bulgaria where he was exchanged by his ninja cult leader Jeff Goldblum for six Pop Tarts. His ninja abilities are limited to backhand slapping and spitting. He can juggle seventeen flaming milk cartons and hold his breath for eleven days.
He has been known to break into Pizza Hut to rub pizza dough onto his naked shoulder blades. Ben Vine – Bass, backing vocals The bastard child of Arnold Schwarzenegger and Cher; Ben can talk to giraffes and control their minds. He uses this power to obtain second-hand toilet brushes to add to his collection of thousands, which he stores in his underground bomb shelter. Before collecting toilet brushes Ben was a weatherman for Al-Jazeera TV where he was axed due to his input in ‘The Great Croissant Scandal’ of ’94. He also plays piano with his fists – for the ladies! Jake Snitter – Drums With the ability to grow hair only on his eyelids, Jake has gone from strength to strength in his quest to become a monk.
He has no fingers or toes, using his stumps to help the elderly with their DIY jobs and smash hedgehogs and other miscellaneous roadkill. He had his nose replaced with that of a shrew in a bid to audition as the lead role in Mel Gibson’s ‘The Shrew’, which was unfortunately for Jake adapted to feature a beaver. Read more on Last.fm. User-contributed text is available under the Creative Commons By-SA License; additional terms may apply..